Canadian license plates: Ranked.

"not for canada - australian in disguise" (for-canada) 01/02/2016 at 21:38 • Filed to: shitty lists

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#13: Ontario

Most cars I see with this plate are either not using their turn signal, or taking up 3 parking spaces, so this ranking is mostly out of spite. Fuck you Ontario.

#12: Newfoundland and Labrador

Yawn.

#11: Alberta

It’s red. The province’s name is written in a dated font on top. Moving on!

#10: Saskatchewan

Wheat. Almost as boring as the province! almost

#9: Quebec

You know, making this list, I realized that Canada has some really fucking boring plates. This one’s no exception. It has French on it, which should count for something. Because cheese and berets make everything more interesting.

#8: PEI

Who let the 5 year old use Photoshop to make the plates again? Was it you Jim? Fuck you Jim.

#7: Manitoba

I’ve met Manitobans, and they’re friendly. But I’m thinking that’s some sort of coverup for some mass-murdering going on in Manitoba. I’m onto you fucks!

#6: British Columbia

I don’t know why I like this more than other Western Canadian plates. Perhaps it’s just good memories from roadtrips in BC? Perhaps it is. It’s still boring as hell though.

#5: New Brunswick

Hey guys! We’re bilingual! And we put our confusing as fuck slogan in two languages on our plate! Isn’t that cool?!

#4: Nova Scotia

Boat.

#3: Yukon

The gold panning guy almost looks like he’s picking up a small dog if you squint. Instantly bumps this up at least like 5 spots. Dogs are great.

#2: Nunavut

A stark reminder that if you go to Nunavut, you’ll probably be murdered by a polar bear, so you should hide under an inukshuk if you have to.

#1: Northwest Territories

This plate is a fucking polar bear.

d15b > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 21:46

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#1: Northwest Territories

That is fairly impressive.

d15b > d15b 01/02/2016 at 21:46

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*RAWR* POLAR BEAR CAR

Slant6 > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 21:50

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Saw it coming.

gin-san - shitpost specialist > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 21:56

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Because cheese and berets make everything more interesting.

This is Nouvelle-France; poutine and Villeneuves make everything more exciting. I would have said toques in place of Villeneuves but they’re just so we don’t suffer from brain freeze despite having eaten no frozen products in months.

#13: Ontario

I fucking live here; I’m pretty sure suppressing road rage will result in an earl y death.

#12 - #3: Whatever

Whatever. PEI and Manitoba tried with colour, NS makes sense, but I like the NB plate. Also, the NB plate isn’t pretentious or anything; it could’ve been, “Be... Amazing.” or “Be... Pioneering.” or some kind of bullshit but instead is it’s basically saying, “NB... Some People Live Here.”

#2: Nunavut

Now we’re talking!

#1: Northwest Territories

I’d love to register a Porsche with a 9xx plate if possible. Ideally a Singer (I guess with 4WD since it is the NWT) with #964. Or a Vanquish with #007. Perhaps a M3 with #E30. You can have your sweet chassis designation embossed on an aurora-borealis-painted polar bear - this is best plate.

CB > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:00

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Wait, insulting Ontario drivers and saying Ontario has a boring plate, then giving Quebec a pass for having an equally boring plate and even worse drivers? I call bullshit.

not for canada - australian in disguise > CB 01/02/2016 at 22:01

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Meh, not as many Quebecers driving about in Alberta. Probably for the best.

CB > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:13

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Then you do not know fear.

Your boy, BJR > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:14

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Your reasoning for bumping Yukon up should have also bumped Newfoundland and Labrador up as well, as it has 2 confirmed dog breed names on it

someassemblyrequired > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:17

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PEI’s new plate is quite a bit better:

Also the NB ones are hilarious as they just reversed an old PEI slogan (The place to be... in ‘73) from their 1973-onward plates.

Svart Smart, traded in his Smart > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:21

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I want to go to there.

Frenchlicker > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:35

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Indiana needs a whitetail deer version of the Northwest Territories one.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > d15b 01/02/2016 at 22:37

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Polar bear AND northern lights. Want.

SteveLehto > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 22:54

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Quebec gets my vote. The mystery of the saying is priceless.

norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 23:07

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Holy fuck Canada could you be any less imaginative with your plates?

Zipppy, Mazdurp builder, Probeski owner and former ricerboy > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/02/2016 at 23:11

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Canadian military license plates would like to talk for being excluded from this list.

not for canada - australian in disguise > norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback 01/02/2016 at 23:19

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“Yes” - New Zealand

someassemblyrequired > SteveLehto 01/02/2016 at 23:27

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Roughly translated it is “I remember.” Separatists added it to the plate in the late 70s, but it was coined by the architect of the provincial parliament in the late 19th century. He never explained it, but the general consensus is that it was a reference to its founding as a French colony and the British leaders that allowed them to retain some of their French traditions.

The Crazy Kanuck; RIP Oppositelock > CB 01/03/2016 at 02:03

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Toronto is where the bad drivers are. I had to drive the 401, I took the collectors (most useless idea ever). It was also my first time a 6 lane highway.

gergey - Wishes vette was Datsun > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/03/2016 at 02:16

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This is kinda cool, should be ranked higher than the pooping guy with the giant lemon

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > not for canada - australian in disguise 01/03/2016 at 02:33

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Personally, I rate Ontario above Quebec, but below PEI.

To me, Quebec’s license plate looks like the most dated and unimaginative. Plus you can get the Ontario plates with different graphics if you want.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > someassemblyrequired 01/03/2016 at 02:36

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All the more reason why the Quebec plate should be #13... YOU SEPARATISTS LOST AGAINST THE BRITISH AND MORE RECENTLY, LOST THE REFERENDUM... GET OVER IT!!!

KusabiSensei - Captain of the Toronto Maple Leafs > SteveLehto 01/03/2016 at 06:57

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Je me souviens - I remember. The reflexive construct is foreign to anglophones, but it personalises the act of remembrance to a francophone. (More faithfully translated as “I, myself, remember”)

In these three words lives the entire history and being of Champlain’s work, and La Nouvelle France. A bit interesting that Louisiana hasn’t picked up on it (but their own history gives clues to that).

SteveLehto > someassemblyrequired 01/03/2016 at 08:49

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“I [myself] remember.” I’ve read up on it (I used it as a dedication in a book I wrote) and find the whole story fascinating.

TokyoNRose-Wyoming, only a little worse than Colorado! > Frenchlicker 03/05/2016 at 17:16

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Im just imagining for Wyoming :)